Who will step up for the real Islam?

As one grows older (especially in the dear homeland), it is usual to suddenly discover religion. You’d see previously fun aunties & uncles rediscovering their mortality and trying to cram a life’s worth of Islam ki khidmat into their remaining years. The Khidmat is usually limited to criticizing the younger generation for their Godless ways and trying to hammer the fear of God into them.

However, a few months back, a friend’s mom took another step ahead. She approached another friend’s mother who happens to be a Christian, and tried to spread the message of Islam. With the best of intentions she asked the Christian woman to reconsider her faith clarifying that if she had not asked her to convert to Islam, she would have been held accountable on the Day of Judgment. The other lady smiled, thanked her for her concern and said “Behan hum aisay hi theek hain, kam az kam hum log apnay churches main baqi Christians ko to nahi mar rahay.”

 If I wasn’t scared of having a fatwa issued against me this is where I would have paused and said, Christians one, Muslims zero.

But of course, one can’t joke about these things now a day, it is too dangerous.

The politically correct reaction, I guess is for me to pause and say Aztagfirrullah. Only, in this instance any Aztaghfirullahs I utter, will be directed at Muslims themselves and that again is something I shouldn’t do publicly. After all, anyone might find it offensive that I am trying to banish the devil from a follower of Islam when the narrative also includes a follower of a supposedly lesser religion. So, I’m left with an anecdote that tells of a lot of things which have gone haywire with our perception and interpretation of Islam, but even though it stirs up a lot of conflicting emotion in me, I am not at a liberty to discuss or even voice what I feel.

I’ve been taught to take Islam at face value. We all have. We are supposed to be Naqis-ul-Aqal (especially since I’m a women). So even though, I have been given a very inquisitive mind, I am not supposed to inquire about the philosophy behind a lot of religious practices and beliefs. I am supposed to blame my nafs for any doubts rising inside my mind.

I’m supposed to believe – Without question – Blindly.

And somehow, for 20 years or so, I did believe like that. Blindly & stubbornly, I banished all questions lying at the fringes of my mind & blamed my own lack of faith for all doubts. But then we entered this era. This era of extremism, of fear, this era of knowing that you aren’t safe anywhere, cause at any given time, one of our own Muslim brethren might decide to attack. And for me, the dynamics of religion changed.

It started with being scared for my brothers every time they left for Friday prayers, progressed to huge arguments trying to convince them not to go, cause after all God can’t blame them for praying at home if another Muslim is ready to blow them up in a mosque. I’ve grown more and more confused about Islam as various Lashkars waged their Islamic wars, killing and maiming other Muslims, thanking God for His greatness as the body counts rose.

Of course, we all know this isn’t the real Islam.

We know that Islam is the religion of peace. And yet, this knowing doesn’t really negate the fact that thousands of Muslims have been killed in Pakistan by Muslims themselves. And somehow, instead of making Muslims denounce extremism, it has made a lot of us more rigid towards their faith. Over the last few years, the extremism of thought has risen within the country. The devout have become increasingly more devout and the liberals have become exceedingly more liberal.

Both sides have become extremely intolerant of the other and for both groups, the only right way, seems to be the domination of their own philosophies over others.

In all this confusion, the only ‘guidance’ available to the masses comes either in the form of the Friday Sermons or a TV Host famous for shedding buckets of tears every Shab-e-Qadr and declaring some minorities Wajib ul Qatl.

Where are the Muslim scholars who can give us a view of Islam that is not so full of hate? If this isn’t the real Islam, where are the people who can show us what Islam really is about? Islam is a part of my identity and defending it comes as a reflex rather than a reaction. And yet, when someone like me needs to clear my head about my faith, I do not know anyone I can turn to without the fear of persecution. I know people who preach Shia, Sunni, Deo bandi, Baralvi and a dozen other ways of practicing the religion, I need one, who can teach me how to practice the Islam that really can be called a religion of reason and peace.

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