Everytime you wonder how things could get any worse for Pakistan – the government obliges you with a prompt response.

To manage the shortfall of Natural Gas in winters – the government has decided to close CNG stations for a while. All CNG Statiosn would be closed systematically, for two days every week. The sechedule is to be announced this Saturday.

And you know what is different about this decision – when we went out to get VoxPops from the public regarding this decision, more than half the people we tried to talk to could not even respond. They stood there, unbelieving, asking us again & again, if this was a cruel joke. Those who responded had one thing to say, the government would only be happy, after sucking life out of every one of us.

As the public tries to comprehend the impact of this decision, Federal Minister Information & Broadcasting, Kamar zaman Kaira goes on air, breezing over that issue, and once again imploring the public to stop consuming this much sugar.

So people of want-e-aziz, cut back your sugar intake & start eating healthy, with CNG soon to be short in supply it might actually be a good idea to have enough stamina to start commuting the old fashioned way – by using your legs.

You know the whole NaBloWriMo thing – despite blogging for seven years, I have never really felt the urge to contribute. Mainly cause well, the name is a mistake you know. National  blog writing month? There is nothing even vaguely national about blogging – it is a totally international phenomena and thus, I keep feeling that the whole thing itself is a huge grammatical mistake.

However, somehow, today, I ended up signing up for it. Yeah I KNOW I didnt blog on November 1st but still.

Why? Basically cause I was bored. But I hope, that on a subconscious level somewhere, this was an attempt to seek some inspiration in an otherwise very routine existence.

Here’s to 30 days of continuous blogging.

After I get the FAQs out of the way, the blogging will hopefully get a little less mundane & a little more interesting.

Duh Moment: It was actually NaBloPoMo that I was aiming for. Trust me to sign up on the wrong forum, but since I already read the FAQs there, to say nothing of filling out the profile info, I think I’d just add the blog to both sites.

At this rate, (I hope) I’d be signing up for NaNoWriMo next.

Driving to office today, the flashing orange on the highway caught my eye immediately – I nudged poor A. with an excited ‘looook’.

He rolled his eyes.

I’ve asked him the question every single day for a couple of weeks – When are trees going to change colors?

I saw the first one today – In a week or so, the trees lining up the road to office would be covered with red n maroon leaves.

Fall is finally here.

We heard it knocking when the wind turned crisp – we knew it was there when soup and coffee became comforts again – but fall, cannot really be declared till the leaves change the palette, right?

The last few weeks have seen me diving into the culinary world with no guide save tastebuds – I’ve roasted, baked, fried & stewed chicken – I’ve baked potatoes, roasted tomatoes, pickled red radishes & even tried a new version of oven baked mixed veggies – all successfully, thank you very much.

Even though most of the culinary adventures have been undertaken on Sundays – today, the blasts, the NRO, the admission of the presence of 412 blackwater guards & other things of depressing, newsy nature combined with an ongoing war with the head office are making me yearn for some homemade comfort.

So, even though it is almost 10 and I am still stuck in office – I’ll go home today, make some soup, boil some pasta, toss it with a tomato sauce spiced with loads of black pepper, mustard power & oregano, put on a sissy movie (You’ve Got Mail, anyone?) & talk, till A. really cant stand it anymore. J

This country, makes me want to phase out – totally!

Hope everyone has had a day not filled with so much stress.

P.S. today mars the completion of my first year at Dunya TV  – which basically means that my vacations folder is full again & I have a month’s annual leave to avail. Hello Karachi!

When it comes to getting the un-pleasantries out of the way, there is nothing like bullets.

-          Hilary Clinton’s cultural tour – from Shahi Qila to PNCA, the ‘sharing a laugh’ captions in papers, the ‘we are reaching out to people’ drama! If you were reaching out to people you’d have cut the trip short so that the government could concentrate on the victims of the Peshawar blast instead of sharing ‘laughs’ with you. Oh & people are not just the chosen ones with security passes.

-          Rehman Malik – Bastard.

-          The Government – should roll over and die in shame. Only they are to dheet to do so.

-          The PEMRA Ordinance – And NO it isn’t the suppression of media that is pissing me off, it is the hypocrisy of the PPP. THESE are the people who camped out / went on hunger strikes with the media when Musharraf was imposing THIS VERY ordinance. Now they are acting like we are just some spolt brats who need two tight slaps to get in shape.

-          The NRO bullshit – WHY the pretence of democracy? WHY call it a decision of the people when you have added TWO members in the committee AFTER the NRO was handed over just so you could get the measly extra vote to pass the darn bill?

-          The People Downstairs – they either fight/ argue all the time or the women just don’t know exactly how LOUD they are. They wash clothes for THREE HOURS straight, EVERY SINGLE DAY, from EIGHT A.M. to eleven, making absolutely sure, that when I take a shower, there is simply no hot water left. They exclaim LOUDLY over starplus dramas. And the grandm downstairs, actually HIT my kam wali bachi and threatened to call the police cause the kid would not take THEIR trash out for the nth time muft main.

-          The Headoffice – Lameass idiots.

-          Random shit – archives, kanjoos log, rude people,  pregnant girls who bend over to pick stuff up from floor without realizing the how much can be seen through the loose fitting clothes, facebook, obsessive bitches.

And ofcourse, I have next to no friends anymore. Oh and if cooking and housekeeping came more naturaly to me, it would have been slightly easier.

The old man did have a vest full of bullets – they called him a sucide bomber, but he wasnt – not really. He was only smuggling the bullets to Bagh. And while it is no small crime in itself, I feel sorry for him.

A bent old  man with nine kids back home – caught like a fly in a web – he sounds so helpless. Ugh! I dont know why I feel sorry for him . I want to hate him for being a pawn of terror.

But how can you hate someone, who, for the need of money, does something this desperate, for twenty five hundered rupees!

Hell, take two friends out for lunch and you’d end up spending more. And then there are people, who agreee to do things like this, in times like this, to get 2500 Rs.

I feel sorry for the poor old man. I hope, they eventually let him go without any permenant damage.

And seriously?

Forced family planning is the only solution to the problems of this country. No other thing can stop this downfall.

In ten days, my first year at Dunya TV would be completed. As a reward I have been told to come to offiec at 11 – even though my work does NOT start till 2 or end before 10. Plus I have been told NOT to leave before overlooking things for the 12 O’ clock bulletin at  night.

The reason for asking me to work around 12 hours? I’m in a ‘responsible position’ and it would be a shame to ‘have to let me go’. I hate being blackmailed with thie firing threat, cause I have been giving 100% to this organization – With the reporters & the resources they have provided, I dont understand HOW they can ask for more.

Is there no place, where one can work with dignity?

I wish this office featured one of these.

Newsflash: Pakistan’s security agencies have gained the capability to counter terrorist attacks!

The source of this amazing, unbelievable revelation? Federal Minister of Information & Broadcasting, the honorable Qamar Zaman Kaira.  This gem alone, justifies his position as the Information Minister.

Ofcourse, after his proud exclamation, we have suffered two more terrorist attacks within a matter of hours. The blast in Peshawar brings today’s count to five – starting with three attacks in Lahore, then the Kohat Blast and now the attack in Peshawar.

Ofcourse, the terrorists have NOT been successful in their designs cause only four people were reporter dead from Kohat & only a kid was in Peshawar. Who obviously don’t count, cause huh, what is a child or two when you think of the whole this as a WAR against terrorism.

As per the senior Provincial Minister Bashir Ahmed BIlor, Humara to yeh iman hai, kay ya in ko marin gain, ya khud marain gain

How lucky we are to have leaders who consider themselves to be one of us no?

We have faced worse times and in all likeliness, we will face worse again. For the situation in the country is not likely to diffuse anytime soon.

The Army & the States have had too many vested interests to wipe out the Taliban in the past & now, the monster has broken the leash. Excuse the pop-culture reference but like the T virus in Resident Evil – the Taliban have strengthened and started a chain reaction that leads to more and more turmoil and more and more people succumbing to the bad side.  The terrorism has uprooted almost all the investment coming in, the economy lies seething in a ditch, crisis brew on top of one another & the masses are left undefended while the VIPs blow most of the countries resources on their personal luxury. Add to this a government headed by someone who proudly held the Mr. Ten Percent label & a global situation falling apart at the seams – you have the lethal formula to keep the country unstable, rolling downhill at an alarming speed.

And yet, instead of actually taking the responsibility of the situation and acting to save the country, our leaders, elected or not – have so far continued to indulge in vile self serving rhetoric.

As three cities burn with the venom being spewed all over the country, the leader of the PML-N, Mian Nawaz Sharif, addresses the nation, focusing on The Kerry Lugar Bill. The last three minutes of his psycho babble have been filled with details of the ‘prosperity’ that rained on the nation during the N-League eras. Ofcourse, all this has followed his humble proclamation that ‘this is not the time to remind the nation of what we did’.

To top it Hazib-ut-Tehrir just sent me an gloating SMS saying Hizb-ut-Tahrir pehly hi Ummat ko khabardar kar chuki thi keh Amrica aun kay agent Hukumran,Waziristan Operation kerne K liye Shehri ilaqon main Dhmakoon ka silsila shuru karian gain.

What does one choose when the options are as bleak as Nawaz, Zardari & the Fundamentalists?

In all truth, I don’t know who to feel sorrier for – the forces working for Democracy here or the voters who have to choose the lesser evil.

Is it just me or is following the attacks in Lahore actually too exhausting?

Yesterday the U.S. had issued a welcoming statement – hailing FM Shah Mehmood Qureshi’s visit as an important step towards resolving the controversy surrounding the Kerry-Lugar Bill.

Today, it turns out their ‘resolve’ doesn’t resemble anything that we, Pakistanis would call resolve.  John Kerry, one of the authors of the Bill, has declared that U.S. would not be making any amendments in the Bill. Rather, they would be explaining the Bill more clearly to remove all the ‘misunderstandings’ surrounding the Bill.

Which basically translates to.”Be happy that we are tolerating your needless nagging & get ready to digest a lot of hogwash ‘cause the superpowers gets what it wants, HA!” please allow me to add, “specifically from a country whose leaders are okay with selling out their people for 5000 dollars a piece”.

Needless to say, this is added fuel for the fire the Opposition has been tending to & thus this session of the National Assembly would soon be turning into an akhara of the finest sort. Yesterday. Faisal Saleh Hayat christened the Bill as ‘Kerry-Huqqani Bill’ and PPP’s Azra Pahajo responded very maturely by starting a brawl. With women like her & Firdos Ashiq Awan in the Parliament, no wonder nobody misses former Law Minister Wasi Zafar’s colorful language.  

The thing about the Kerry-Lugar Bill is, it is eating up all the other issues. The parliament has NOT discussed the implications of the GHQ attack as they should have been discussed. Granted, it was an attack on the Army and the Army is not going to take any dictations from the Parliamnt – Regardless, an attack on headquaters of the defenders of the nation, concerns the nation in a very intimate way. We have the right to know how such an attack was possible – how is it going to effect the security situation and how exactly does it change our internal policy towards Al Qaida and the Taliban.

I’m a staunch supporter of media working in ‘national interest’ and maligning the Army’s image would not exactly be in our interest – so with the rest of the media, I have also written scripts after scripts praising the Jawans and the Martyrs for ‘foiling’ the terrorist designs. But temporarily allowing the ISPR to direct the news content does NOT mean that we have been fooled.

That the whole fiasco was a huge security letdown is an obvious fact. That the GHQ failed to stop eight people, however well armed, from entering and taking a building into control is so unbelievable that no possible conclusions jump to mind. HOW do a handful of terrorists take 43 people hostage, within the headquarters of the Army? And that too when the Army Chief is present within the facility.

DG ISPR, Major Gen. Ather Abbas has conveniently explained that despite prior intelligence reports it is simply not possible to give warranties regarding any individual attack. My question is, if the attack on your own headquarters could not be foiled, what hope are we left with?

Talk has been of the Waziristan Operation – but the Army’s luke warm responses & the recent statements coming in from the Big Brother indicate that the attack, while NOT arranged, might be used to prepare the grounds for a much more controversial warzone. The American Counsel General today has kindly pointed out the existence of Taliban & AL Qaida in Quetta and Baluchistan. He has warned the Pakistani Government that a lack of action would soon turn Quetta into another Waziristan.

Quetta – not a remote, tribal area – but the Capital of the largest province of Pakistan – is in danger of turning into another Waziristan?

So, basically, the parallels have been drawn. And with those, comes the question of the Drone attacks. Logistically, Quetta is an easier target than Waziristan cause the U.S. Air Base is right in the vicinity. Which brings us to the burning question – how is it that the U.S. allowed, Taliban /Al-Qaida to group in the province that houses their base? Nobody is under the delusion that Quetta is not under constant American surveillance.

Would Quetta be facing the wrath of Americans now? Probably.

But is the attack on GHQ enough to scare the nation into taking this breach on sovereignty lightly? Not likely.

The Army thus faces a situation worse than any faced before – Swat is still a khula mahaz so to say – Waziristan is an inevitable challenge, with Quetta & MureedK making rounds on America’s wish list, the Army has to fight not only against the terrorists, but also for their image.

I’ve had a headache for teh last three dys that jumps from one side to another. The eyes are ugly, black & swollen up, the crow feet make me look old, the dry weather is making my already dry skin faky and my slobiness is not letting me excercise.

Needless to say, it hasnt been  good three days.

Oper say, once again, I’ve failed to name an appropriate price for my work and now would be doing a freeance project for mere peanuts. I want to punch my self.

I wish the headache would leave me alone.